Snippet #32

“When you walk into this church, don’t you just get overwhelmed with this sense of. . .” Marek struggled for words, “Divine intervention almost.”

Sophie shook her head. “No, not really.”

            “But Sophie, religion. This beautiful church, because God.”  Marek looked puzzled. I knew why. Standing in front of him was the girl that cried over the beauty of mosques she’d never see, and yet she seemingly felt nothing in a beautiful Gothic church.

            Sophie gave Marek a dirty look, “No. This beautiful church, because humans.”

            “So you’re saying God has nothing to do with this, at all?”

“Yes. Isn’t it better to be moved by the actions of people? To say, someone like me made this church. Someone designed it. Someone built it. God didn’t do that. We did. That’s like saying because Van Gogh’s father was a pastor that God blessed Van Gogh with his artistic brilliance. No. Van Gogh made masterpieces. I won’t have you trivialize Van Gogh by claiming God meant for him to do so. Isn’t Van Gogh enough?”

Snippet #29

 “Why is romance the only love that matters to people? What about the friendships? Doesn’t that count? Does the feeling of a friendship so meaningful that you feel it deep inside of you and know that they are a part of you and you them, does that not count? What makes romance so fucking special? What makes romance better? It’s easier to replace a love interest than it is to replace a friend that understands you without words, that knows how to make you laugh when no one else can, that you can tell your secrets to and not be judged. I just don’t get it.”

Snippet #28

 “Hun, don’t let your dreams scare you away.”

Snippet #26

Jonáš looked defeated. “What’s so wrong with wanting to make movies anyway?” His voice went soft and you could hear the tears he was holding back.

Then it clicked. Jonáš met up with his parents today.

Sophie got up and gave him a hug. “It’ll be okay. They just want you to be okay. Everyone is a bit hypocritical when it comes to their children. Maybe that’s why parents drive children crazy. And maybe all children are too critical of their parents, which is why all children drive their parents crazy. But I promise you, they just want you to be okay.”

Marek looked rueful, “The older you get, the less of a future you have.”

Snippet #5

Seeing my face, she felt the need to explain, “When I say you need to change, I don’t mean anything by it. You don’t need to be fixed; you’re not broken. But, you will age. You will get old. It’s your choice: Do you want laugh lines or frown lines? Personally, I can’t wait for all the laugh lines I’ll have. It’ll say that I had fun, you know? Your face is a road map to your life. When you’re old, what do you want your face to say about you?”

“That I’ve aged well.”

“I think you’re missing the point.” Sophie smiled.

“Unfortunately, that’s what we’re taught to believe. What does that say about us as a society? That we’d rather be beautiful than have anything of value to share with the world?” Visions of beautiful, thin blonde girls I could never be littered the media in Tashkent; TV commercials, ads, billboards, magazines, movies.

Marek snorted, “That’s because society can see better than it can think.”

Snippet #3

“It’s the curse of being human – feeling so entirely alone despite being constantly surrounded by other people. We all feel like no one would love us if they saw us the way we see ourselves. That’s why it’s such a great thing that people have eyes of their own.”

Snippet #2

“When people draw hearts, I just have to laugh. Do they actually know what they are drawing? Hearts don’t look like that. Hearts are clumps of blood and arteries and circulation and feeling and muscle. When I see a drawn heart, I see an abstract, pictorial penis and scrotum. Or like a top view of a guy’s butt and he just happens be have a boner at the same time. But what really gets me are all the young girls drawing them all over their notebooks or on their skin or posting the stupid less-than-three’s on the internet. And I just want to be like, ‘LOOK AT WHAT YOU’RE DRAWING! THAT IS NOT A HEART.’”

“Someday, Sophie, you need to learn when to keep things you think to yourself. I’ll never be able to look at a heart in the same way again. They’ve lost their innocence.”

She shrugged. “It had to happen someday.”

“What did?”

“Losing innocence. Relationships fail, hearts break, people get broken. Life doesn’t let anyone remain innocent, and that’s the real tragedy.” 

Snippet #1

“Life is like a giant monologue, a soliloquy, full of your ambitions, motives and mistakes. What I’m most afraid of is that one day I’m going to wake up and realize that my whole life’s soliloquy is completely and utterly wrong and all my thoughts have been misguided and useless.”

“You worry about the strangest things.”

“Don’t you worry that your life is meaningless? In this big whole universe of infinite planets and solar systems and galaxies, most of whose existence we’ll never even know, and yet we’re given conscious thought. That’s something special, and a lot of pressure. I just don’t want to waste it.”