Sharks -- 11 December 2016

You come into my home

And try to blame me

For you not knowing the rules 

Soft -- 10 December 2016

Your kiss was as soft as the rain

I was pelted by your downpour.

I’m left drenched

Shaking
But unrepentant

Peter Pan -- 1 December 2016

When I was fifteen, I looked to adulthood

As if that would provide all the answers I needed

Too young to know that your world can still change at nineteen,

At twenty, at twenty-four, at thirty-two

When I was fifteen, I was too scared to be frivolous

But now I’m too old to be reckless

I spent my youth laser-focused

Who was I to know that all I craved was stability?

But I’m not Peter Pan and people don’t ever stop growing
We just learn to leave things behind

I Want To Swallow You Whole -- 28 November 2016

I want to swallow you whole

Encompass you in the folds of my stomach

Churning with the sweetmeats and sin

You dig deep and get under my skin

But it always seems to blister

I give you soft smiles and rough hands

I’ve never been careful with things that can break

The effects of your hands on mine would be devastating

I never saw love coming until it pulled me over a cliff

And are there rocks at the bottom

Or is this just another example of “love hurts”?

I offer to you the pulse in my chest

And neck and wrists

The word love is lodged in my throat

But every day it loosens until soon

My words pour out like honey, sweet and thick

But oh so slow

I love when you use plural pronouns

‘Us’ and ‘we’ and ‘our’

Please whisper promises into the crevices of my collarbone

That I’m not sure we’ll be able to keep

I want to carve my poetry into your heart
So everyone can see you were loved

Caution -- 5 September 2016

You’re a fucking mess of a person

You keep your secrets in your collarbone

And no matter how many bruises I leave behind

I cannot suck them out of you

Your face is a WARNING sign that I’ve always ignored

I trace your cheekbones with my fingertips, committing every curve to memory

And it burns

But I would take all the scars

All the blistered fingers for just a touch, just a taste of you

Maybe I just want to see if I can hold the flame

Maybe I just want to punch you in the mouth with my mouth

But regardless, my feelings, well

They don’t flee

The horrific part is that I’m comfortable enough to call this love

But no matter how hard I try

I cannot love mental illness away
Love doesn’t fix everything, but God it helps.

Kerosene -- 16 October 2016

My veins are filled with kerosene

Your breath tickles my face

And I ignite

I feel all my anger in my head

And my veins

And my hands

But I feel love in my chest

I’ve never been religious

But I see heaven when you touch me

With your cool hands on my overheated skin
And all I can think is god and yes

Don't -- 9 September 2016

“Don’t bite the hand that feeds you”

They say

But I’m not being fed, I’m being strangled

Am I supposed to say thank you when the grip loosens?

“Don’t fight fire with fire”

They say

But the fire of steel traps differs from the fire in the eyes of the ensnared

Am I supposed to be polite to those that wish me harm?

“There is no excuse for violence”

They say

But violence isn’t violence when it’s self-defense

Am I supposed to idly sit by and accept the faults of my abusers?

The only fault in violence is in my retaliation

Because my anger is the only thing people are mad about